The Pastimonious and the Frenitory – Mel’s Fictionary

Some days, when life isn’t going exactly the way it should (or at least the way I think it should), I sit myself down and look for a way of doing something very useful.

Then, I had this idea, during a Scrabble game (with myself). I thought of how Lewis Carroll was the pre-inventor of Scrabble. I thought of Jabberwocky, a poem with nonsensical words, some of which eventually became bona fide members of the dictionary. I thought of all the words I ‘invent’ during a single game trying to make best use of my letters.

Lewis Carroll did it. I can do it.

I will make up new words. New words for the world!

Move over brillig, gyre and gymbol. Mel is here!!

A new invented word is sometimes called a neologism. One way is to combine two words into one that carries a mixed meaning. This is referred to as a ‘portmanteau’.

I am not alone!

https://www.ted.com/talks/erin_mckean_go_ahead_make_up_new_words?language=en

It turns out that inventing words is now more difficult than it was in the 19th century. So many people are writing so much. But it is easy to check whether you are the ‘first’.

And it is easy to be disappointed. When my children were little, I invented the nonsensical word “feduji” to describe those rubbery, inedible little bits of chewy chicken. The word is still in common use. In my family.

But when I looked up “feduji”, this is what I found:

• feduji – MyAnimeList.net

  myanimelist.net/profile/feduji

  Jan 24, 2015 – My Anime list: the internet’s largest anime database. Browse information, rankings, reviews and discussions on all of your favorite titles and …

• feduji’s Profile – MyAnimeList.net

  myanimelist.net/profile/feduji/clubs

  feduji’s Anime List | feduji’s Manga List. feduji’s Profile. Anime List Manga List Send MessageSend Friend Request. Favorite Anime. No anime favorites added.

Yes, it is true (as I discovered scrolling down), feduji is a new word (mine) in the English language, but I am not the first to claim it as my own. Internetically speaking, that is.

So I set out to invent words that are new. So new, they don’t exist anywhere in the universe. In any context. In any blog. In any language. At least, not as far as those clever search bots are concerned.

Here is my crop thus far. They were not easy to find. Many of my hopefuls had already been ‘spoken for’.

Probably lots of other bored people are trying to come up with new words as we speak. Who knows, this might even turn into a sport of sorts.

I gave you clues as to what each of the new words means to me, but perhaps better to let your own imagination fleap so it will remain a mistaferous (also misspelled as mystaferous) vertiglio.

I hope you have fun with them. Trust me, it’s much more fun making up your own. Send yours to me and I promise to publish the best. I might even give you credit!

And now, all that remains is to type them here. After all,the search bots will be reading every single word of this book in a day or two. And I will be waiting to kvelp the moment I see my new words in G-search next week. Maybe even Bing! Then they will have a life of their own. So here they are:

Frelicast – think a bunch of hassidim doing a webinar on Purim

Fraspination – When you’re equally frastrated and aspined. Also the name of a new bored game.

Fictinimous – self-serving and made up

Grabnosaur – dinosaur with poor manners, burps and grabs others’ desserts. Not to be confused with grebnosaur, it’s European relative.

Parsimonetary – the economics of a frugal finance minister

Frambionous (this one is easy)

Balalorca (hint- think of Spanish poetry put to Russian music)

Jackpotpourri – A savory find

Specigate – When you’re just not spelling out your specifics

Hilasticy (sometimes appearing as hilasticity) – I’m flexible on this one. Perhaps Hillary explaining one of her miss demeanours.

Pessipuss – A bear in a bull stock market. Brother Dave was one.

Shulliness – Have to ask my wife

Underegg – to underestimate, opposite of overegg and sideways eggonedge.

Frenetarium (sometimes misspelled as frenetorium, frenitorium, frenitarium) – where frenetic people tend to end up.

Polititis –  a disease which infects you with human kindness

sometimes called polite-is or even Polite-itis.

Durmitionary – While you were sleeping

Dictaberry – A fruit you can talk down to

Rabbooze (think Manischewitz)

Icicutory  (think of a very cold place)

Dampinaria – A disease you get from being in wet places

Theoplaric – Religious nonsense

Pantigule – A riddle that has to do with underwear

Pellitross – A bird that never existed

Shastoric – You had to be there

Plegitonic – Not to be confused with pledgitonic

Strypatin – A new drug

Homilitary – Service of sorts

Pindacoil – With a curl at the top

Lickorable – Something very sweet

Almostchotomy – Not quite a dichotomy, as in two things that are almostchotomous, but not quite dichotomous.

Trycaughtame – A dichotomy, when there are three, not two

Mishinigeh (sometimes misspelled as mishinige) – a madman on a mission. Michiganeh if it’s someone headed in that direction.

Pathomelic – the disease of being me.

Petchabulous – something amazing, in seven minutes or less, perhaps to do with a dachshund.

Serendinternet – something serendipitous which I appear to

have coined on Facebook in 2009.

Shwoofling- floating, waving, swaying, undulating. e.g., The mermaid’s hair was shwoofling as she swam over the corals. Verb: to shwoofle.

Zodipack – astrology in a card game

Oxygism – ask Yossi Vardi

Fraspination – the name of the game

Narocissist (see also narocissism) – self-centered, without seeing the big picture .

Plastiflippancy – Flippant, but with options (sometimes spelled plastoflippancy)

Expidentials – Exponents that get you from here to there, sometimes quite serendipitous

Floptured – As in “floptured thinking”. Ideas that are ruptured/flipped/flopped/twisted

Itwea –  Pronounced eye-twee-a. Twisted idea.

Hippochotomous – a divisible hippo, not to be confused with

Hippocaughtamoose, which is a different cattle of fish

slimyander – cousin of the Salem ‘ander’, distinct relative of sly meander, neither of these to be confused with salamanders or other slippery reptiles that actually exist.

neggatarian- someone who will eat anything but eggs (someimes spelt negatarian).

Cyrcoyle – A learning process that comes round to its beginning. For example, Sir Alexander Fleming was a highly intelligent man. At the opposite end of the scale we have the wombicile who is an imbecile from the womb. Imbecile comes from the Greek word for stick. So does the word ‘bacillus’ which is a Gram positive bacteria. Gram positive bacteria are sensitive to penicillin which was discovered by Sir Alexander Fleming.

Ramplifier, ramplification, ramplifly – to take an idea and not only amplify it, but also discover the ramp with which to do so – dedicate to my dear friend Allon Sasson, who is the primary ramplifier!

castinate, castination – when the castinet player comes in behind the beat. also see castanate, castanation.

Sauceroo – A sauce restaurant

Frabonia – The country where Frim Fram Sauce originated

Grandpagarten (sometimes misspelled as grandpargarden, grandpagarden, grandgarten, grandgarden, grandmagarten, grandagarten) –

Grandpagarten is the day care center where my grandpa goes every day. It’s just like a kindergarten, except there is no playground or sand box,  and you don’t graduate to grade one afterwards.

Harold suggested Grandergarten. I like that too.

Multispectric shift

fixtacles – glasses that help over come chromatic shift

spectracles – much the same

pixtacles – like wise

scratchybax – they live on the dark side of the last planet in the universe.

superflotz – superhero who puts his enemies out with particularly nasty flatulence

Oh, and this really long word for my upcoming children’s book:

passiflorabellicaboolamanifesterritorimonospectacleness

Neither Oxford Dictionary nor Merriam Webster define it as the “magical ability to detect singular territorial manifestations upon the wearing of glasses and the ingesting of passiflora”.  But I do.

Your Google search – passiflorabellicaboolamanifesterritorimonospectacleness – did not match any documents.

Suggestions:

• Make sure that all words are spelled correctly.
• Try different keywords.
• Try more general keywords.

So Mr. Carroll, it’s high time for some carrolicity.

Please make room. I’m on my pleuripathetic way.

More from the floor:

transclarency, vegitory, divergidity, divergity, vegitory, saluphory, ownus, coaless, swimen, editoiletries, interdectionary, invigital, magninimous, ribidulous, juxtemporaneous.

circondicular

nostabotomy- an operation that removes your nostalgia lobe

Antimenitism – Why I’m having trouble finding a job?

Pagiary – When it’s more than just a sentence or two