My Utah Divorce With a Child

About the divorce process

I’m seeing more and more Utah online divorce cases with children. These divorces are almost always nasty with lots of emotions involved. For a while, the judge would routinely order one parent to move out of the house so there could be stability for the children. Nowadays that’s rarely happening since Utah is a safe haven state and you no longer need to live separately. Some judges still do this, but if you ask me it makes things worse in the long run. 

You realize as you read more and more about the divorce process that Utah has it completely backwards. The current system actually encourages the parties to fight, so they fight and cause trauma to the kids. What we should have is civil resolution first where we protect the interests of the children, then encourage parents to settle their disputes civilly without having to go through a process that encourages them to fight. 

If you’re asking the court for custody, custody decisions in Utah start off with a presumption that kids should be in the primary care of their mothers. If you are the father then the presumption is that you have very little time spent with your child. That’s how it’s supposed to work. 

Divorce is always a painful experience. There’s no escaping that. In the state of Utah the process of deciding child custody can be especially bitter and protracted. 

There are many approaches to terminating a marriage that has children, but at the end of the day, there are only two choices:

(1) you can do what is best for you and your spouse, or (2) you can do what is best for the kids. So for those of you here in Utah about to go through one of the more difficult experiences that life has to offer, I hope you’ll benefit from my perspective as a father who chose to do what he felt was best 

Family law attorneys can often be engaged in bitter divorce battles. Some studies show that as much as 80% of Utah marriages result in divorce. 

I was getting divorced and needed to move to Utah. I was a single father with sole custody of my daughter at the time. My wife, who lived in another state, agreed to sign off on our divorce if I moved away and agreed to pay certain expenses of raising our daughter. It looked like we had a fair deal. I wanted my girl to live with me, and she wanted her daughter to go back home where she lived with her ex-husband and his new wife.

Filed for divorce and custody

Being a Utah lawyer since 1981, I know that divorce situations with children can be more complicated and require more care and energy than cases without them. 

In the state of Utah, if a person wants to divorce and they have a child with their spouse, that person can petition a court for joint custody. The divorce will be granted without having to prove that there has been some sort of marital wrongdoing. 

As a recent divorce, I have had my fill of Utah divorce. Serving as a volunteer mediator is one way I get this emotion out of my system. 

I’ve tried to be an honest and attentive father to my daughter, but she has suffered at the hands of her mother. I have filed for divorce and custody of my child in Utah. I’m seeking a relatively amicable settlement, but I’m soon going to lose patience. I’m not going to let my child get hurt any more. 

A really high percentage of Utah families go through a divorce. It’s about 50% in the state. 

One of your biggest challenges after a divorce is to be a better single parent than you were as a married couple. In my opinion this is very hard because it’s hard to care more about your kid than your spouse. 

My daughter (who is age 2) won’t talk to me. I am not allowed to take her away from the home she lives in with her mother without prior court approval. My ex-wife and her parents are trying to get full custody of my daughter citing non-parental acts. 

Financial difficulties

Divorce without a child is an agreement between the two parties, but divorce with a child involves a third person – a judge who will decide custody rights and visitation schedules. 

A divorce is one of the most stressful things you can face. Going through a divorce with a child is even more difficult. If you are going through a divorce, even if you have a good relationship with your ex-spouse and there are no major problems with the children, it will still be an extremely trying time in your life. 

In Utah, the court will only consider financial resources of the family members as a way to resolve a dispute. If one spouse is having financial difficulties or is unable to earn an income, this doesn’t matter – the other spouse can be ordered to pay temporary support and later permanent support based on their own ability to pay. 

A child custody case with divorce, default parenting plan and parenting plans that share custody between two homes. 

Before I take on the issues of custody, let me make a general observation about divorce. Having been through the experience, as well as having heard of others’ experiences, I know that divorce can be one of life’s greatest traumas. Even for those who are prepared and expect it, there are still jolts and blows that only time will ease. Even the most painful experience can be survivable when we understand we weren’t at fault and are being treated fairly. 

This is for a client who wants to know how long it would be with shared custody and 3 nights a week with the ex-husband. 

If you’ve been married for five years or less, it’s typical to be able to divorce in four months or less. The process is simple and uses the same forms you’d use if you were creating a joint bank account. You can usually do it yourself without help from an attorney if your assets are simple and there are no kids involved.