Talking Fan Twan – For Sale

One day, as Tzipi is riding her scooter on the trails of Kibbutz Buchenwald, 

in front of a broken down, shanty-style house,

she sees a sign: “Talking Fan Twan For Sale.”

“Fan Twan? Fan Twan? What the hell is Fan Twan?”

 “I’m gonna check this out…” 

She rings the bell and the owner, a man called Likutz, appears and tells her “Fan Twan is in the backyard.”

Tzipi goes into the backyard and there she sees a sexy-chubby cat sitting there.

“Are you Fan Twan?”

“That’s right,” the cat replies.

After Tzipi recovers from the shock of hearing a cat speaking,

she says “So… what’s your story?”

Fan Twan looks up and says, “Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young.

I wanted to help the government, so I told the Mossad.

In no time, they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders.

No one figured a cat would be eavesdropping…

“I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running.

But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn’t getting any younger…

So I decided to settle down.”

“I signed up for a position at the airport to do some undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in.”

“I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals.”

“I got married, had a mess of kittens, and now I’m just retired.” Says Fan Twan.

Tzipi is amazed.

She goes inside the house and asks the owner what he wants for Fan Twan.

“Ten dollars,” the guy says.

“Ten dollars?? Ten dollars???

Fan Twan is amazing!!!

Why on earth are you selling him so cheap??”

“Because Fan Twan is a damn liar and you shouldn’t believe a word he’s saying…”